August 23, 2013

Skinny Jeans!

I am wearing skinny jeans today for the first time ever!

Happy Friday!


August 19, 2013

Out With the Old, In With the New

I moved into my apartment almost three an a half years ago.  Over the years, I have gained weight, lost weight, gained again and lost again.  With so much fluctuation, I have accumulated quite a bit of clothing.  In about a month, I will be moving again.  I tend to hold on to clothing far longer than I should, but I figured this move is a good excuse to try on every clothing article and donate what I don't need.  So this weekend, that is exactly what I did.  I stood in front of the mirror and literally tried on every single item in my closet.  

As I gained weight, I bought larger sizes but for some reason, I couldn't get myself to throw away all of the clothes that were too small for me. Lately, I have used those items to gauge my weight loss. Every now an then, especially when I am not feeling motivated, I will go in my closet and try on an item of clothing that used to be too small.  There is nothing better than trying on a pair of pants that used to be too small and then finally being able to comfortably button them.

The strange thing is, even though these items of clothing help motivate me, I still can't get myself to wear any of them even though they all fit (or are too big).  They remind me of my old self.  The old girl who used to eat junk food all night, who was too lazy to workout, who was depressed and who did not have any confidence in herself.  I am so thankful I fit into my old clothes again, but as I tried everything on this weekend, I realized I am ready to move on from them.

I have proven to myself that I am better than I once was.  I am fit, healthy, happy, in love and I have completely changed the way I view life. I don't feel the need to hold on to my clothes anymore.  I had a goal and that was to be able to fit into all of my old clothes from college.  I achieved that.  Now, I feel like it is time to donate those clothes and make room for new clothes. 

I donated five bags of clothes that are too big for me now and no longer reflect who I am.  I went shopping afterwards and bought myself a couple of new items.  A pair of skinny jeans (my first pair ever!), a couple of  long sleeve tops and a new pair of shoes.  A year ago, I would have never bought any of the clothes I bought this weekend because I had no confidence in my appearance and chose to hide under my clothes.

Goodbye old clothes, I am moving on!

Hope you had a great weekend!


August 2, 2013

My Body Shaper

This is my shaper, one of my many shapers. Most people don't go around posting pictures of their under garments, but this particular under garment has been important to me.  This was the first shaper I ever purchased.  Being fat is really uncomfortable, but this shaper made me feel ok in my own skin and hid my ever present muffin top. 

 I have worn a shaper every single day for the last two years.  Everyday, no matter what.  I literally would purchase clothing around my shapers.  Meaning, I never bought tank tops or anything strapless because I couldn't wear my shaper with it.  How pathetic.  I was so attached to these shapers, yet I was also so embarrassed by them. Although these shapers gave me confidence and comfort, they also made me realize how much weight I had actually gained.  I wouldn't need a shaper if I hadn't gained all this weight. 

So for the last two years, I have worn a shaper. One of my many goals of losing weight was to 'burn my shaper'.  I am so sick of having to wear this tight, constricting shaper every single day of my life. This week, however, I made a decision.  No more shapers.  Enough is enough.  I have lost almost 50 lbs and I don't need to hide behind my shapers anymore.  I don't need a shaper to give me confidence to leave the house anymore. So, for the last three days, I have not worn my shaper.  Let me tell you, I feel so FREE! I forgot how good it felt to not need a shaper, to have enough confidence without one.  Want to know the coolest part? With or without my shaper, I don't have a muffin top anymore.  I love it.

This first picture was taken last October, right when I made the decision to lose weight. Second picture is today, August 2nd. 
This first picture was taken July 2011, right when I started to gain all of my weight.  Second picture is today, August 2nd.  So much happier!