December 6, 2012

Faith Over Fear

I worked out with my trainer last night.  We did a bunch of legs, butt, back and chest.

It felt good to workout. For that hour, I didn't have my mind on everything that has been stressing me out.  Just laughed with the girls and worked out.

We all got to talking about how hard it is to meet people, friends and dates, once you get older.  You kind of get into a routine and its hard to get out and actually meet new people.  I told the girls that this is something I really struggle with.  Go to work, go to the gym, grocery shop and then home.  That is my typical day and it doesn't leave much room for anything else. I feel like I haven't done anything fun in months and it is really starting to get to me.  On the weekends, I usually hang out with my family and see the same people every weekend.  I have been told I look unapproachable when I am out in public alone.  I think I get in my own little world and tend to forget it doesn't make me look very friendly.  My trainer stopped me and said, maybe that is something I need to work on changing.  Be more aware of my surroundings, smile at people, say hi.

So, this morning at the gas station, I did just that.  I looked up and around, smiled at people who I made eye contact. To my surprise, I was approached by a guy.  He came over, introduced himself and told me he wanted to let me know that he thought I was beautiful.  Unfortunately, he was not my type, but I told him thank you and he walked back to his car.  Goodness, I can't even remember the last time someone actually came up and talked to me in public or the last time I was hit on.  Kind of sad.  This is definitely something I need to work on.

I made another realization last night.  My fear completely drives my stress levels.  I fear so many things and they all begin to completely overwhelm me.  My fear of being sick and in bad health.  My fear of never reaching my goal.  My fear of being alone.  My fear of the world ending.  These fears cause me to worry so much.  I am beginning to realize that if I had any faith in myself and God, I would not have these fears.  Sometimes I have a hard time trusting that God has a bigger plan for me.  Although I don't know his plan, I need to trust the path I am on and listen to him.

Today, I am reminding myself that my faith needs to be bigger than my fear.  I need to pray about things and the LET THEM GO and trust that God is listening.

Praying today is better than yesterday.

Jess

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