November 6, 2012

Gym Motivation of the Day

I am finding this statement truer and truer everyday.  Starting this whole process, I can honestly say I didn't love myself very much.  Heck, I was pretty mean to myself and constantly talked down to myself.  I know I love myself more than I did a month ago.  But, I have no idea how to gauge how much I love myself.  I don't think I know what it feels like to completely love yourself 100%.  Not even sure if anyone does.  Either way, I know I love myself more than I did last month, probably even last week and I am sure I will love myself even more in the months to come.

As the weeks go by, I am learning so much about myself.  Discovering my strengths and weaknesses and learning to love myself for who I am.  Situations that used to completely stress me out and throw me for a loop don't bother me as much as they used to.  If I would have had that texting conversation that I had last night even a month ago, I can honestly say I would have texted some pretty mean things to that person and I would have been so defensive.  I would have gone off on them to say the least.  I can think of a list of things that I would like to say to this person, but honestly, why waste my breath?  I held my composure last night, I didn't try to take digs back at them.  I am more confident in myself.  Even though I knew he was in the wrong, I was confident enough to just keep my mouth shut and be the bigger person.  I think that right there proves I am more confident than I used to be and I love myself more.

Since I love myself more, I feel less of a need to fight to keep people who don't love me in my life. I am becoming my own friend and I don't need to beg people to stay in my life if they don't want to.  Not everyone is going to like me, but all that matters is that I like myself and I am satisfied with the person I am. As hard as it is to gauge how much you love yourself, moments like these prove to me that I am growing and loving myself more.  These kind of realizations keep me motivated to keep going.  I can't wait to continue learning about myself and see where I am at in a few months.

Tonight, I will be going to the gym.  I feel like I should take a break to rest my knee, but I just feel too guilty doing so.  I am going to do the bike again and lift weights.  I will continue to ice and elevate my knee tonight and hope it feels better soon!

Tonight, this is what is motivating me to get to the gym:

1. I want more realizations like the one above.
2. Working out feels so good.
3. I always leave in a better mood.
4. I want to learn more about myself.
5. I want to be stronger, better, faster.
6. I want to fit into my skinny  jeans.
7. I want to love myself even more.
8. I want to have more confidence.
9. I want to start the New Year off right.
10. I want to be one step closer to my goal!

Jess

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