November 28, 2012

Gym Motivation of the Day

I blog in order to motivate myself, to be accountable and also to face my fears.  Two months ago, my main fear was getting back in the gym and feeling embarrassed.  My fears are a lot different now.

I will be the first to admit that all of this talk about the end of the world really freaking scares me.  There is so much I want to do and the thought of not getting the opportunity to do so completely scares me.  As I see more and more results, I get scared that I might not get to see myself in the body I have always dreamed of. That is freaking scary.

I want this so bad for myself.  I am fearful of never reaching my goal. Yesterday was a huge reminder of what my old self was like and it really woke me up.  The thought of going back to how I used to be, giving up and just accepting my life the way it used to be is really scary.

This fear is my motivation to never give up.  Going back to the way things were is just not an option, too scary.  All this talk of the end of the world has really made me realize that I need to work hard to get where I want to go.  I get a lot of comments about resting and being too hard on myself.  But honestly, sometimes I feel like I don't have time to rest. Each day I don't do something productive puts me another day further from my goal.  I want this too bad to rest, even though I know I should sometimes.

I am working out with my trainer tonight and I can't freaking wait. I look forward to my workouts now, they get me closer to where I want to be.  This fear gets my adrenalin going.  I fear being mediocre, unproductive and settling for less than I deserve. I will not give up.

Tonight, this is what is motivating me to get to the gym:

1. The thought of living how I used to live - completely miserable.
2. Working out makes me feel good about myself.
3. Today will put me one step closer to my goal.
4. To all of those who post rude comments on here, I can't wait to prove you wrong.
5. I want to make myself proud.
6. I want this to be a lifestyle.
7. Yesterday's workout wasn't great, looking forward to making today's workout better.
8. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin.
9. I want to run more and lift heavier weights.

Last, but not least,

10. I am scared at the thought of not reaching my goal - refuse to give up.



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