October 9, 2012

"Who Are You Meant to Be?"

While working on my 'O Dream Board', I came across a quiz, "Who Are You Meant To Be?".  Ah, my answer to life in a simple quiz, if only it were that easy.  So, I took the short quiz and the results came out that I am striving to be secure and to help.  Well, even though I already knew that, I actually realized a lot while reading the quiz results.  (Quiz results below).

I like being secure, I avoid change like the plague, I like feeling comfortable in my surroundings and my relationships.  But what I what I realized, the more I try to keep my surroundings and relationships stable, I become controlling.  Avoiding change and trying to make the others in my life avoid change too.  When things become unstable, I begin to assume the worst.  Which, if you have read The Secret, then you'll know that negative thoughts attract negative things.  Thoughts become things.  Assume the worst and I guarantee you will get the worst.  The more I try to control the uncontrollable, the more unstable my life becomes.  Guess I need to really learn to go with the flow and learn to roll with the punches.

The other one was Striving to Help.  Oh boy.  Being selfless, caring too much, giving everything you have to others and leaving nothing for myself.  I do for others, put myself on the back burner and when others do not realize what I do for them, I get bitter.  Why don't they thank me for everything I do for them?  Don't they understand just HOW out of the way I went to lend them a hand? The purpose of helping others is not to get a pat on the back or even get a simple 'thank you'.  Do good for others because you want to and expect nothing in return.  So easy to say, yet so hard for me to actually do.  I think everyone likes to know they are appreciated, but I need to learn to do things because I want to, not for a pat on the back.  

I love where it says "So before giving your time to everyone else, make sure you take care of yourself (physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  And practice waiting until someone asks for help."  Help yourself first.  You cannot rely on others to help you.  Do what you have to do for yourself first and when someone asks your for help, go help them.  I don't have to jump and help everyone and try to be the hero.  Sit back, do your own thing and if someone needs help, they will reach out to you and ask you.

You are a stabilizer: You are the rock in a storm, the one others lean on. Loyal and com-mitted in your relationships, you maintain a support system of like-minded people whom you look out for. (So what if you do it behind the scenes and don't get credit?) You're careful with money, cherish the familiar, and defend the traditions you care about.

What to watch out for: Rapidly changing environments (like a shaky economy) are very hard for you. As a result of such instability, you can spiral into a state where everything seems catastrophic and you're sure life will only get worse. You can also become over controlling, rejecting any suggestion that doesn't conform to your idea of the way things should be. To avoid being too rigid, each month try changing one habit. Exper-iment with clothes, drive a different way to work, initiate conversations about subjects you wouldn't normally discuss. And when the opportunity arises to do something new, avoid the impulse to immediately say no—this may be nerve-racking, but the more you practice, the less anxious you'll feel.

Looking ahead: You find meaning in pursuing safety and certainty. Focusing on family can give you great satisfaction. Also consider planting a vegetable garden, hosting class reunions, volunteering as a lifeguard, teaching at your church or temple. In the work arena, look for positions where you're responsible for others, and for making sure everyone is following the rules. You work well in any environment that is stable and consistent. Careers in government, finance, the military, law enforcement, and product manufacturing are strong options for you.

You are a nurturer: You are caring and supportive in your personal relationships as well as in your job. Unselfish and altruistic by nature, you often anticipate the needs of those around you before they are aware of them. If there is one thing that brings you satisfaction, it's tending to others.

What to watch out for: When you're doing things for people only to feel valued, you can become resentful. And if you sense that your help is not appreciated, you may end up playing the martyr. So before giving your time to everyone else, make sure to take care of yourself (physically, emotionally, and spiritually). And practice waiting until someone asks for help: While you may be able to perceive what a person needs, that doesn't mean she wants you to attend to it.

Looking ahead: It's important for you to be genuinely of service in acknowledged ways. Whether you foster a child, care for an elderly aunt, rescue animals, or support a rock star's career as her personal assistant, look for opportunities where you can help other people or bigger causes. Volunteer work has your name written on it, as do many careers: nursing, teaching, customer service, healing, social work. Don't feel pressured to run the company or lead the project; you may be even more effective as some one's right hand. And you'll likely find working with other people more meaningful than flying solo.


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